If you’re experiencing infertility, this Monday might be feeling extra Monday-ish in the wake of Mother’s Day. Not because you literally have a hangover, but because yesterday was an emotional roller coaster.
What was yesterday like for you?
Maybe you attended a brunch celebrating the beautiful mothers in your life. Or locked yourself in your bedroom watching Netflix and eating take out. Maybe you gave your godchildren/nieces/nephews or pets extra snuggles. Maybe you cried in church as you listened to a homily or song about what a holy calling it is to be a mother. Or hid in the bathroom during a Mother’s Day gathering to collect yourself.
I always feel so conflicted on Mother’s Day. On one hand, my husband and I have the most amazing mothers, grandmothers, godmothers, and aunts in our lives. I’m so grateful to God for all of them, and they deserve to be celebrated in a BIG way!!
But when you’re experiencing infertility, the day can be hard. You might feel sad when you’re in church due to all the mother references, where it’s usually a place of peace and comfort. You’re reminded God in His infinite wisdom is telling you ‘no’ or ‘not yet’ and another year has passed and your arms are still empty.
All that grief packed into one 24 hour period can leave you feeling exhausted and blah the next day.
Last year it took me a long time to shake the sadness I felt after Mother’s Day. Today, I’m happy to report I don’t feel any of that! Could it be exhaustion from chasing around a new puppy or that she requires so much attention and care I’m distracted? Perhaps.
Or maybe it’s because Ascension Thursday was moved to Sunday in our Diocese this year, so our priest focused on that for his homily instead of talking about how holy and sanctifying motherhood is. When our priest asked mothers to stand for a special blessing, he included godmothers, which I’m grateful to say I am to 4 perfect children. <3
More than all of that, I think it’s the healing that has occurred in my heart the last few years and the hope I have for the future. I believe the Lord is telling me not to give up on being a mother. He says to keep waiting, so wait I shall.
How was your Mother’s Day? How can I pray for you this week as you recover from the ups and downs of yesterday?